hair and grammar

it’s another rainy grey day in Vancouver, but after the blessings of days of sun and cool wind, rain rounds it all out.

“What is it?”

“nothing….I don’t want to say”

“C’mon, what’s the matter?”

“It’s embarrassing. I don’t want to say.”

“Sure ya do. You can tell me.”

“it’s your eyebrows. I feel bad about wanting you to change something about yourself.”

My girlfriend is a bit appalled about my unruly eyebrows. I think they’re among my best features. So wild and curly. Also,  like a cat’s whiskers, they sense the way forward…

But she wanted to trim them.

“It’s okay. We all want some things to change about other people, you get to ask for what you want. I, for instance, want you to change the way you use pronouns”. She often says things like “her and me” or “me and Ruth” — i started to correct her early on, but she would get all annoyed and uppity. so I stopped.

“But I want to change that, too.”

“okay. I’ll let you trim my eyebrows if you let me tell you when you talk wrong.”

…

“Is there enough to make a toque?”

“Almost”.

“Ow! you said you wouldn’t pluck, only trim!”

“Don’t be a baby. hold still, i’m almost done.”

“I’m NOT a baby! Babies don’t have facial hair.”

My eyebrows are now tamed, close to my face. She assures me they will grow back. Until then, I’ll just clean my glasses more to make up  for the loss of my ‘northern whiskers’. And now I can’t wait to make the necessary alterations to her unruly grammar.

Everybody wins.